11:57 a.m. - 2006-05-02
Or We Could Go With Fluffy or Rover
Names: aaarrgghh!!

Like numbers, I'm obsessed with names. I'd like to think I'm like most women, though, who've been thinking of names for their future offspring since they were in nursery school. My choices have changed somewhat over the years (I now think Sebastian is better suited for a shampoo and Cleopatra belongs in history lessons), but I've always had a running list of potential baby names in my head.

Does the name you give your child have any impact on that child's life? Can you really alter his destiny simply by virtue of naming your son Chauncey over Cletus? And do you really have to see your child and get to know it before deciding on its name?

I myself was almost named not Diana, but either April or Nicole. In fact, legend has it that I went without a name for the first three days of my life, only finally given the name Diana after the hospital threatened to name me themselves. Legend also has it that my original middle name "Lynne" (and not "Lynn" or "Lyn") was so given to me because my frugal dad wanted to squeeze as many letters onto the name as possible, thereby getting the biggest bang for his buck. My brother's name, Gary Thomas Onorio, stems from my dad's childhood dream of one day owning a Pontiac(?) GTO.

I do plan to find out the sex of my baby in a few weeks, but I'm not sure that I'll name my child in utero. (And even if I do, I'm not divulging the name until after the birth. There is nothing worse than telling people the name you've picked out, only to see them try to conceal the brief look of horror that crosses their face.)

However, I am willing to share the preliminary list I've come up with. You'll have some strong opinions on several of them, I'm sure, mostly due to the fact that you knew someone with that name in grade school/high school/college and he/she was a bully/burnout/homecoming queen/quarterback.

For the first time, I present to you, possible names for the future Baby Funk:

Boys:
Aldrin
Alden
Alexander
Andrew
Austen
Bailey
Dylan
Emerson
Enzo
Giacomo
Hayden
Henry
Hunter
Matteo
Parker

Girls:

Feel free to let me know if there are some you particularly like. Please keep your mouth shut if there are ones you hate -- that way, we can still be friends.

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