9:00 p.m. - 2006-07-17
I Can't Help It If I Like Cookies
Hola, amigos. It's been a while since I rapped at ya. Wish I could report that I've been spending my time doing something exciting, productive and/or amusing, but you know the truth: it's been long stretches of sleeping punctuated by frequent brief periods of eating.
And speaking of which: WHY HAS NO ONE TOLD ME THAT I AM AMASSING BACK FAT? Is everyone just afraid of being sat on? I discovered this on Saturday afternoon, as I faced my "temporarily Ruben-esque form" (as a client urged me to describe it, when I suggested "bovine-like") in the three-way mirror at Target to try on maternity t-shirts. Ohmygod, I'm hideous! I used to have a kind-of nice back, I thought, but now it's lumpy and mis-shapen, and well, just, fat. Everyone keeps telling me "You're all belly!" but I knew that I couldn't have 20 pounds of belly. Gives new meaning to "baby got back," alright. Does any culture find this attractive? I didn't think so.
I continue to grow at an alarming rate, and so does Pumpkin. I feel her squirmy movements pretty much all the time now, except they've started to morph into more kicking that squirminess. For this reason, I've re-nicknamed her Kicky-Punchy Kickerson, or just Kicky for short.
But I am slightly worried about my own weight gain. As of this morning, I am plus 19 pounds. The total recommended weight gain is 25-35 pounds, and I'd like to stay on the lighter side of that number. Problem is, I've been gaining roughly a pound a week, and I have just over 13 more weeks to go. Do the math. (You know, 'cause I can't.) As my mom likes to tell me (every chance she gets), I need to lay off the desserts. But it's so HARD. I've become really accustomed to my strict ice cream diet (tonight's selection: tiramisu gelato from Trader Joe's. Insert Homer Simpson drooling sound here.), and damn that Pepperidge Farm, but they make the best freakin' chocolate chip cookie one can buy in a pre-packaged form. In fact, upon noticing an unopened bag of chocolate chips in my fridge (how did that happen?) and some leftover toffee chips, I was all set to make homemade cookies tonight, but I kind of got sidetracked with falling asleep on the sofa with my purring cat in front of that show with the chef who screams at everyone. So there, 500 calories saved. Plus I think we're out of butter, so it wouldn't have worked.
Anyway, as soon as lick the bowl I ate my gelato from, I'm off to bed, seeing as how I've only been awake for maybe 9 hours total today (I came home from work at lunch to change clothes -- the maternity skirt I was wearing was not able to contain my girth, and then I feel asleep on the sofa for a while).
