3:21 p.m. - 2006-08-23
Seething
I guess the pregnancy hormones (the bad ones, the ones that are in the most abundant supply) are back. I'm losing my patience rapidly, and I really have to cut it out, since I have roughly eight more weeks of being pregnant and I'm only going to become more irritable and anxious as these weeks progress.
I'm just back from a late-lunchtime trip to Target. My post-it note list read like this:
pj's (I don't actually own any pajamas, but as I start to think about packing a bag for the hospital, I realized that I need one or two bonafide pairs of pj's that will allow me to 1.) look cute when people come visit me in the hospital and 2.) whip out a boob and nurse)
undies (I own lots of these, but all thongs -- TMI? -- and that's not what I'll want to be wearing after I deliver Pumpkin and endure several weeks of various and sundry bodily fluids escaping from my nether regions, so I'm breaking down and buying briefs (ick) of the granny panty variety)
pads (to catch above-referenced bodily fluids)
travel size toiletries (Sibley is chi-chi, but it ain't the Ritz)
Luna bars (because I'm fresh out)
thank you cards (my shower is Saturday)
Van Morrison CD (I've been having his songs like an earwig in my brain lately, and I can't find the CD I want on iTunes)
I got to Target and pushed my cart around leisurely. Luna bars -- 4 of the peanut butter cookie variety, yum. Pads -- oy, it's been a long time since I've needed these. Can't remember what I picked up, but they were definitely "super" and "long" and will no doubt be "uncomfortable" and "gross" when I'm wearing them. Picked out some good-smelling shampoo and conditioner and body wash in teeny bottles. Swung through the maternity section and picked up a few cute things on sale to try on. Then headed for the lingerie section. I parked my cart off to the side while I embarked on a near-fruitless search for something that was cute and would allow me to nurse. I settled on some striped pj's and headed toward my cart... which was nowhere to be found. I looked all around the department, and it was just gone. I asked a few sales people if they had seen it, and when they said they hadn't, the f-bomb started leaving my mouth. I wasn't making a scene, really, but you know when you get all fired enough that you just pass the point of decorum? I tend to pass that point quickly anyway, and with the hormones, well, look out. For God's sake, how long do you have to push around a cart loaded with Luna bars and maxi pads before you realize it's not yours? PAY ATTENTION, PEOPLE. I know people love to live in their own worlds, even in public, but holy mother of God, quit that!
I was daunted by the prospect of starting over, but I did. Back to the Luna bars, back to the maxi pads. Back to the travel size toiletry aisle, where at this point, I was slamming items into my cart, which only made them bounce back out and onto the floor, causing others around me to allow me a wide berth, lest they become throttled by a psychotic pregnant woman. Then back to the maternity section, where OF COURSE the items I had originally picked out were no longer there in my size. I did manage to find a shirt, and then I wound back over to lingerie, where I found nursing bras, and then headed to the fitting room to try it all on. I was totally frazzled with what must have been an insane look in my eyes. I parked my cart and begged the attendant not to let anyone move it, because if I came out of the fitting room and it wasn't there, I was going to be really upset. When I came out, it was not where I left it, and I thought I would have to collapse on the floor and cry, but the attendant showed me it had been moved only a few feet. What is it about shopping carts and their inability to remain stationary at Target? Oh, and then guess what I found, in the sock section? Uh-huh. My original cart. The only difference was that I had also originally picked up a bottle of face wash, too, so I transferred that to my new cart.
Anyway, on my way out, I bought a chocolate bar and a Coke, and I'm slowly calming down now. I think I have about one hour of sanity left in me before I need to leave for the day.
